Whoever says parenting is a walk in the part, well it’s safe to say they probably don’t have kids.
Parenting is hard and downright challenging at times. We are tested in ways we can never prepare for. Yet somehow being a parent may be the most fulfilling role we have.
Once those babies arrive and the sleep deprivation sets in, your relationship will morph to meet the demands of your newborns. Oftentimes, when working with clients, new parents ask us for tips on helping them maintain the integrity of being a couple after kids.
We have some good news for you!
Our new book, You Can Two!: The Essential Twins Preparation Guide includes an entire chapter on parenting as a team where we outline effective relationship strategies that will help new parents navigate the rocky waters that new parents may experience from time to time.
Parenting is like a dance: It is at its most beautiful when you follow the music, letting it lead you. The best dancers trust their partners to take the reins when it feels right, and even when they don’t seem to feel the rhythm, let them dance like they’ve never danced before. – You Can Two! (pg. 148)
The more time you spend together preemptively talking about your parenting styles and aligning your perceptions of who you want to be as parents will be invaluable when you get deep into the throes of parenting twins.
Children thrive in consistent environments where they can expect the same response from both of their parents. Kids will be kids, trying to finagle their way around the decision each parent makes, but when parents work as a team, kids learn valuable lessons about the solidarity that should exist in a healthy relationship.
Ultimately, raising children forces us to take an in-depth look at our own beliefs or why we are the way we are. Being stuck in your ways or working against each other only creates polarizing tension in a household, which makes it tougher for your marriage and your children to thrive. (pg. 148-149)
The earlier you can get on the same page with your partner, and learn to be a unified unit, the easier it will be to navigate through the tough times.
2 Relationship Strategies that Help Your Marriage Survive Children:
We have filled not only this chapter, but the entire book with tips, strategies and even journaling opportunities that will ensure your relationship is on solid ground before the kids even arrive. We dug deep into our own experiences, the good and the bad, and asked fellow twin parents to share their most sound relationship advice, providing you with the tools to parent your twins as a team and thrive in your new role.
So comment below, what are some strategies you use to keep your partnership solid after you’ve had kids? We’d love to hear from you!